The Alternative Comedy Memorial Society

Permitted Heckles

  1. We appreciate what you’re trying to do!
  2. Tell us a joke! The one's you've been telling so far have been brilliant.*
  3. Could you speak a bit louder please?
  4. Would you like a woman to sort it out?
  5. Oh, Thom.
  6. I drew you a cat.**
  7. Don't break the yurt!
  8. And yet.
  9. I/we love you, but not how you're being just right now.
  10. Can I have Joz's tenner?
  11. 'Buffy' didn't start till 1997!
  12. No more whisk[e]y for you!
  13. I feel destroyed!
  14. Twisted fire hazard!
  15. Stick it on the wall!
  16. Is it moral?
  17. [any prime number]
  18. Weird cuckold situation.
  19. Sounds a bit Catholic to me,[insert name here]!
  20. And also with you.[Or any of the other congregation responses from the Catholic mass.]

*Not permitted if said sarcastically.
**Only permitted if accompanied by a drawing of a cat. A MORALLY GOOD CAT. Inexplicably popular.

Please note, the above heckles are only permitted at the Alternative Comedy Memorial Society (ACMS) shows. Purged heckles - as of 24/10/16 - include the little used "Help - my friend here is having a stroke. Not really.", the initially practical "It's next to Espionage!", and the cruelly accusatory "That's a Joe Pasquale joke, surely."

The merits of "Why are you dressed as an oven?" are still - as of February 2017 - being considered; it may yet be afforded permanent Permitted status. Regardless, it is a fun thing to ask Thom if you see/sense him out & about.

There are different permitted heckles for use at the Alternative Alternative Comedy Memorial Society (AACMS) rival/splinter shows. These include:

  1. There's one in Worcester!
  2. Also creepy.
  3. Stick to your guns!
  4. That's a Tony Law joke, surely.
  5. Huzzah!
  6. Yes, you're the Third Earl of Right!